Every Thursday, Nadine goes for her therapy session. It has come to a point where I look forward to Thursdays. It’s a Nadine day in that sense. She gets really stretched mentally while going through her sessions. Some days, she goes through simple his/her/it differentiation. Some days, it’s memory work of shapes and sizes. And some days it’s just 1 full hour of chatting. The range is wide, the work is hard.
That’s how it is for her. Hard work every Thursday.
For me? It used to be a day of kicking myself. When I see what the therapist does, and the activities they go through, I go “Why didn’t I pick that up about Nadine?” “Didn’t you notice she couldn’t do this?” “And look at that! Such an easy task, and you could have taught her!”
But I passed that. *phew* It was no point berating myself. It didn’t help me, and it didn’t help her. Guilt is not a part of therapy. It does hit you. I mean, which parent wouldn’t feel the entire responsibility of the child on his shoulder? I won’t even want to dwell on that, cos it depresses you, and it’s just going through cycles of “What ifs” and “I should haves”. This looking back mentality has gone on long enough.
Now Thursdays are a celebration days. We celebrate the new stuff Nadine can do, the achievements she has made and the milestones conquered. (Thursdays are also homework days. The therapist gives us—parents—work to do at home for the coming week) But it’s great joy.
I don’t focus on her being slower than her peers. I don’t sigh at how she has only mastered stage 2 when her friends can do stage 5 backwards. ohhhh but that doesn’t mean I’m not aware of the above. I am aware, and I have to be aware. Those are the yardsticks of society, those are necessary to measure her progress. But focus on them and push her to reach them? Nah…
I thank God daily for what Nadine has accomplished. And on Thursdays, I thank God a little more! I get to see in my untrained eyes (erm.. after 3 months, it’s a little more trained now), the little steps of progress. I stand amazed every Thursday at how God made us—that every tiniest little word/act plays a part in a person’s development. He’s really in control. There’s no doubt about it.
This is part of a series I’ve started – Therapy 101, to document Nadine’s developmental struggles and victories, and to journal my own learning experiences as she goes through hers.
And linking up with